cale livingston

“The End is Not the End”

Not only is that the title of a great House of Heroes album but also an accurate statement for my current dilemma.

Here I am, at the end of my venture with New Hope Diamond Head, about to embark on the epic journey that is “YWAM,” wondering what I’m actually going to do for the next three months of my life. I had a bit of a sobering conversation with a friend who works with YWAM and was informed that it’s basically lectures and schooling with a strict schedule. *Oh goodies! Just what I’ve never wanted…*

Really? Three months of classes that I paid for? I thought I was avoiding college with this missions endeavor. The first thing I thought was, “Uh oh, I’m pretty sure the teachers aren’t going to like me.” Mostly because I’ve never taken the time to do just school before. I don’t even think I have the patience to focus solely on classes and books. If anything, I’ll probably end up doing a lot of extracurricular work in my free time, just to find a release.

I can now count the amount of days I have left at Diamond Head on one hand which is equal parts: exciting, terrifying and convenient. I think my biggest fear is coming to terms with losing my desktop and all that comes with it. No more 22 inch monitor with loud speakers. No more Adobe CS3! If you really want to break it down I’m basically giving up graphic design for photography, my seditary desktop for a portable netbook, and my nocturnal lifestyle for that of a loser (read: regular person). Let’s be honest, school has never been the main focus for any given time of my life. There’s always been something else to accompany and overshadow it. Unfortunately for these YWAM teachers, they’re going to have my full and undivided attention. *Maybe I should apologize in advance?*

Don’t get me wrong, I love learning and I love people, but my tolerance level is usually so high that I go ADHD if my requirements aren’t met. And right now, I’m not holding out hope. Who knows, maybe it’ll be a completely mindblowing and submersive experience. Ultimately, I’ll have to get through it if I ever want to leave the country and take photos abroad since that’s the goal, after all.

What else…?

• Oh, I’m completely obsessed with LifeHacker.com right now. I think their tagline says it all, “Tips and tricks for getting things done.” I must caution, though, that perhaps there’s a point where you have so many tips and tricks that you won’t get anything done. Right now my goal is to find that point! But seriously, I could have used a lot of these programs and features about five years ago and it’s only until just now, right before I have no more use for them, that I find them. Great timing…
• Other good news is I’m finally winding down on the transition from my desktop to netbook. Most of my files are already over and I’m pretty comfortable on it now. Oddly enough, I disabled half of the multi-touch functions on the touchpad because they got annoying. *Score one for minimalism!*
• I still haven’t installed the extra gigabyte of RAM in my netbook either. Somehow I keep forgetting to ask Kamu for the screwdrivers. Hopefully I’ll capitalize on that soon as well.
• I’m also almost done making my list of contacts for YWAM support letters (oh the lucky few).

Ok, I think that’s it for this entry, even if the ending falls a bit flat. It’s sort of like those movies that you love up until the last half an hour.